Kennedy was onto something when he made the famous speech, “We have nothing to fear but fear itself.” I really think he was right. I believe that people are scared of their own emotions.
I know I am. I have been most of my life. And I still am.
I wish I could say that over 20 years of searching and learning has brought me to a place where I accept all of my emotions. But it hasn’t.
“We have nothing to fear but fear itself.” -John F. Kennedy
I wish I could claim that years of my own therapy and being a therapist have revealed to me what it takes to completely accept my emotions. But again… no can do.
I wish I had something other than an “I see you, I get it, I’m with you on this” but I don’t.
Like you, I’m only human, and as far as I can tell, very few of us go through this life without having a conflicted relationship with our own emotions.
Learning to Sit With Your Emotions
I can tell you that emotions are intelligent, and that I have learned that they are a form of communication from the soul. The more we get familiar with them, the more we learn about ourselves.
Some of my favorite emotions to fear are regret, feeling trapped, helplessness, terror, and my personal favorite nemesis– grief. I have always been (I mean, since I was old enough to know what impermanence was) and still am very afraid of grief. I suppose I know that it is the inevitable underbelly of love, and I love hard, so… well, you get it.
So – where is the good news here? Is this just some blog where I talk about how much emotions terrify people, myself included? No.
Here’s what I can tell you about my experience with learning to sit with emotions and navigating how scary they can be:
- I can tell you that I am far and away more accepting of my emotions than I was 20 years ago, so while it might not “go away”, it does get better.
- I can tell you that learning to feel your feelings and still be okay is possible.
- I can tell you that it gets better with time, and a lot of persistence.
- I can tell you that emotions are intelligent, and that I have learned that they are a form of communication from the soul. The more we get familiar with them, the more we learn about ourselves.
And lastly, and maybe most helpful, I can tell you that emotions are an experience, not a constant state of being. What do I mean?
Reframing How You Think About E-Motions
I like to use the word “E-motion” to illustrate my point.
I want you to think of emotions as energy. They move through you, and they pass over you. They animate your body, and they move you– sometimes in a literal sense! And yet they aren’t tangible, or even visible. They are indeed energy that moves through your body, and the one constant about energy is it is always moving.
So I break the word E-motion down to remind myself that it is E–nergy in motion. And if I allow it to (and don’t try and repress it or ignore it or shove it down), it will come in, communicate with me, and guess what? It will eventually leave. Knowing that helps with the emotions I find difficult to feel.
So the next time you find yourself avoiding, defending, or repressing your emotions, try reminding yourself that the emotion is just energy in motion, and if you don’t block the emotion, it will move through you and move beyond you.
Feel like you need more resources to learn to navigate your emotions? Get exclusive access to my free Healing Resources Library, where some of my favorite healers and helpers have added valuable free offerings to finding healing on your own time, on your own terms. You owe it to yourself to heal the wounds that keep you from accessing your inner wisdom.